Unlearning is the form of learning that is rarely talked about. Anything in your life that you are attempting to unlearn that you have held as a core truth or belief, is going to be met with some resistance.
Unlearning (just like learning) is a process.
Life-changing/altering decisions will not be perfected or completed overnight.
Contrary to popular belief, one does not always nor instantly do better because they know better.
Unlearning means that we have to let go of something that is not or no longer working for us. Something that is and probably has been a long-held belief or way of living and being; and in the process of letting these beliefs go we also have to learn something new to replace the old, outdated, and unhelpful behaviors, thought processes, and ideologies with.
This takes time. And in this time (the time in between identifying what no longer is working for you and figuring out what does), you are either relearning (reclaiming yourself) or learning something new altogether.
When you are challenging anything that you previously held as truths and letting go of your default way of thinking– there may be a tough in-between time where you haven’t fully figured out what you want your life to look like in the now. Sometimes in an effort to self-soothe the feelings of uneasiness, we revert back to old ways or resort to repeating our old and outdated patterns of behavior.
And that’s ok. For some of us, this is a part of the process.
It’s already built into our path and accounted for. Sometimes you have to fall off the wagon to learn how to hang on.
In the quest to find your true authentic self, there will be many blockages. Some may be mental, some spiritual, some physical. Some may be rooted in fear and/or rooted in trauma. Some may be rooted in genuinely not knowing how to be any way other than who you’ve known or understood yourself to be–or it could be rooted in not knowing how to do anything other than what you’ve always done.
And that’s ok. This brings you to your starting point. The awareness of yourself.
This is where your journey toward self-awareness begins. When you get to know and accept yourself as you truly are, you leave room and allow space for all of your humanity (flaws included). Self-acceptance can only be attained when you know who you are and are no longer ashamed of yourself for it.
It’s in the awareness of ourselves and the knowing of who we truly are, that we shape our lives into something that has more to offer us than various mechanisms for coping.
We have got to want more for ourselves and our lives. We have got to know that there is Bigger and More out here for us to experience in our lives.
Building a life that you love living, a life that you won’t feel the need to escape from, requires intentionality and patience with yourself and others.
We have to realize that the arrival point and the destination are one and the same. The process starts when you arrive and #Doingthework is the destination. Living and building a life of quality for yourself is the destination. Looking forward to living your life each day without looking for a means of escape is your arrival point.
Waking up each day should feel good because you get to be YOU each day, and that BE-ing is (and feels) AMAZING.
It’s a process. But once you understand the assignment, and understand that you are the assignment, the process gets a lot easier and the quality of your life gets a whole lot better.
The process teaches us what to keep, what to add, and what to get rid of altogether.
So let’s get into this process of finding, re-defining, and figuring out who, how, and what we want to BE.
It’s time for us to Heal, Recover, & Be Free!